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Web dating dangerous, insincere
April 17, 2006
My name is collegegirl441, I am a SWF 5’4” with brown hair and green
eyes seeking a SWM who likes to be outdoors and doesn’t mind watching
chick flicks.
Having read that, do you think you know enough about me to date me?
Absolutely not. Do you know if I even told the truth? Nope. My eyes
are actually blue. Do you feel prepared to discuss long-term
relationship possibilities with me? I hope not.
And yet people do it everyday. They hop from one personals Web site to
another or networking sites such as www.myspace.com looking for
someone with an appealing profile in hopes of finding romance with a
person who may or may not actually exist.
In my opinion, it is virtually impossible to generate a healthy
relationship using only a keyboard and a Webcam. It is important to
actually meet the person you are considering dating, to spend time
with them, get to know their mannerisms and personality, decide
whether you are attracted to them and if your goals and beliefs are
compatible.
Not to mention, it’s nice to know if you really are communicating with
the person you think you are.
On a more serious note, it is also dangerous to play in the Internet
dating pool. Hiding among the individuals genuinely seeking
companionship are online predators – pedophiles, potential rapists or
murderers, or married people just looking for a fling – all waiting to
pounce on the first person foolish enough to say ‘sure, I’ll meet you
in person, lol.’
I
have a friend attending another university who is involved in an
“Internet relationship” with a married man a full 10 years older than
her from another state. They began communicating via e-mail, then
instant messaging. To enhance their IM conversations, they invested in
Webcams. They have now exchanged cell phone numbers and talk to each
other several hours a day.
If that situation doesn’t make you nervous already, my friend ignored
several cardinal safety tips when generating this relationship and, in
my mind, is lucky nothing has yet gone awry. She let this stranger
know what school she is attending, what her class schedule is like and
that she lives in on-campus housing.
Letting such information slip to an aggressive Internet predator could
have resulted in rape, assault, robbery or worse.
I
know the dating waters are rough — I’m in the same boat as the rest of
you — but if nothing else, wear a lifejacket.
If you must Internet date, safeguard yourself by withholding
information about locations and schedules. Don’t agree to meet someone
until you have communicated with him or her for a reasonable period of
time, and when you do meet face to face make sure it is an area you
don’t frequently visit. Don’t go alone and take some pepper spray.
Finally, follow your instincts. If something about the correspondence
feels weird, it probably is.
I
personally do not support Internet dating. My primary recommendation
for those looking for companionship is to try meeting people in the
real world – talk to someone you sit next to in class, attend campus
events or activities around town, be introduced to your roommates’
friends or simply say hi to someone as you walk around campus.
How else would you know if I really am who I say I am? For all you
know, I’m a sweaty fifty-year-old man with a comb-over and a TV dinner
who just wants to see your Spring Break photos.
McKenzie Romero is a senior staff writer for the University Journal.
She can be reached at mromero@suujournal.com
Source: Southern
Utah
University
Journal Online
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